My Euphoria

I may be a mother of 2 beautiful children already but my experience with men isn't really vast even at 29. I only slept with one man in my life, the father of my children, whom you know is gone for good now. I just realized how he only pleased himself and didn't care about returning the favor. It's a bit odd to ever write about my sex life. But we're mature people here. It's not just an act- it's actually part of a relationship. In fact, it's an important factor between couples. If your partner isn't sexually attracted to you anymore then that is a problem. Your partner must be attracted to someone else (or sick?), usually that's the reason. 

Anyway, I am not really liberated- I can't say I am but I am open minded. As long as I am not forced to do it and I like (love) the person I am doing it with, then I'm down for it. So, let's just say I want that Euphoric feeling (will you be my euphoria?), for me, it's the feeling that makes your body elevate out of great pleasure. The feeling of not knowing what to do, you scream (your inner goddess is dancing in fire) and you bury your nails into the depths of the bed. Something about it that unleashes the primitive side of a woman. Your heart's beating fast, your body's heating up... the caress, the kisses, his breath, his lips, his manhood. You want him inside you, you want to feel his skin and you want your tongue all over his and all over his body. Your body would take control, the urge and then you explode with the stars, the meteors and the entire universe. The feeling is just so heavenly.. well, actually, not even. It's an unexplainable delicious, gorgeous, sexy, sumptuous feeling in the world.

Having imagined all of that, I can only picture out someone really special. So,

It's not the act but the person you are doing it with. At least that is what I believe in and that is what I feel. I don't think it would give me that euphoric feeling if I was with someone else (a stranger?). Well, it could also be a matter of preferences. Some people prefer to do it with no strings attached which is totally understandable. Coming from an 8-year failed relationship, I would be the first person to understand. And yes, I am willing to be in that kind of relationship. Investing to a new love would mean another set of pain and I'm not willing to go through that shit all over again. 

But still the hope for someone better to come is there. I still haven't given up on love. Like I always tell myself- Chances, it's infinite and free. So I am going to give myself a chance to be with you, love you and be happy with you. I pray to God that we will make it through the challenges, obstacles and storms. We can do this! Aja! Inshallah.. you are my euphoria :) <3