When The Time Comes...

Heartbreak is part of life. If you haven't experienced it then you have not lived fully. You must be so guarded that you did not allow your heart to be broken. I am glad to have experienced heartbreak. I'm glad to have survived it. I am stronger now and I like the new me =)

You see, I have accepted heartbreak- first you cry, you grieve, you feel insecure, you yearn for the person, you even beg, that unexplanable pain you feel in your heart (even physical pain), your face, shoulders and feet feels heavy. You know they are right about pain, that cliche that says the problem with pain is that it demands to be felt. That darn feeling is demanding (lol). But you see, yes, it demands to be felt but it doesn't stay forever (nothing is forever after all- lol). Pain ends, now that's good news! So don't worry about heartbreak because it ends.  It's just a phase that you go through, that people go through. AS LONG AS YOU HELP YOURSELF get over it. It's just like pilling off the skin, you need to get humiliated with all the ugly traces of the skin while it's pilling BUT when all the pilling is over, you get more beautiful skin. Because the skin that's pilled off are mostly dead skin, useless- unwanted. It's funny I related it to skin pilling off, it's like gross but I think they're sort of the same. Just try to read between the lines.

Actually, the million dollar question is- AM I READY FOR ANOTHER HEARTBREAK? April, my team mate is experiencing heartbreak right now and I have to admit that giving advises is somewhat fun. I feel like a pro in these things. I feel like I'm strong and I know it very well. Experience is a good teacher anyway. 

So when the time comes that I will receive a text or when he tells me he don't want me anymore, I would...

"Ahm, ok" #NgaNga

a. Not say anything and accept whatever he says. After all, I knew that I shouldn't be expecting anything more. 

"Pleasseee don't go" :(

b. BEG- begging is something that I've done and will do for special people in my life. But this would be the last option. 

huhuhuhuhuhuhu

c. Not say anything but cry- cry my heart out (in front of him) because I couldn't help the tears- the pain. Sooo Emo (psychotic actually)...lol

"Why??? I can change for you" (with a snap of a finger)

d. Ask him why? And try to bargain... this is somewhat pathetic but I think this would depend on what would be the reason he wants to dump me. 

"Oh hindeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!"

E. Become hysterical! "YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME!!!!!!" "AAAAAAAAaaaahhhhhhhhhhh" ...LOL Not an option at all.

"Goodbye unkind word!" :(

F. Become suicidal. Why can't you love me the way I love you? I would rather die than live this life without. (do you see the side bangs?lol #emo)

I really couldn't imagine. I cannot internalize. I don't want it to happen. But knowing myself, I think I will still tell him how special he is for me, how much I love him but I respect his decision. I am hurt but I will accept it. I will tell him that I knew this day would come and so I tried to prepare myself. Although you can never really prepare for something like that. I will accept it like a noble person, I will show that I am a strong woman. BUT when I get to be alone, that's when the real show begins. I will isolate myself for a time and deal with the heartache myself. 

Oh God... knock on wood, God forbid. I don't want this to happen anytime soon. So, let's just change the topic. #KBye